I have no idea if I am regressing or not. I am CONSTANTLY cold. I also notice when I “think” too much during the day, I am exhausted at night, which can be a plus because at times I have trouble sleeping. Headaches are daily and they range from annoying to crippling, to scary. The medication I have to take is ridiculous and its side effects make me sleepy at awkward times
I am still getting annoyed easily to obvious bs. I am angry at the fatigue and the pain, but I can’t react the way I want to because I am medicated, which is probably a good thing for others. It may be a good thing for me as well as I keep getting reminded that if I don’t calm down, I won’t heal. I have to accept the fact that this is going to be a LONG healing process. Can someone tell Social Security that? Please. I hate them. If I am around too many people, I get real quiet because I am afraid to speak for fear I sound unintelligent, repetitive or inappropriate. Short term memory seems to be recurring again. I dunno I just feel like I am in a bubble, and I need someone to break me out.
One dope thing is I found mediation. It works, and I wonder if it would enhance if I wasn’t medicated or if it works because I am?
My doctor is right; I am a “hyper thinker”. Thank God I have writing as an outlet. It is the only thing I seem to enjoy anymore and feel I am good at. Except, my typing and spelling have become awful as of late. I don’t know if that is also a side effect, or if I am too hard on myself?
With that, thanks for reading, and keep me in prayer.