were, are, will be

there were days:

my biggest problem was why he didn’t text me today

how was i gonna to get to that store to get all the ingredients for gumbo

were my legs cute enough to wear a mini skirt and knee socks

why did my head hurt so much

oh my God, did i vomit on that nurse?

how long was i unconscious?

 

there are days:

i don’t remember if i took my medicine

even if it’s put in a pill box

because i forget i have a pill box

or where i put it

i swore i paid the electric bill

i’m too embarrassed to ask for help

to complain about headaches

to cry

to be scared to die

because i’m supposed to be physically fine now

so why do i forget words

how to spell them

what they mean

what do i mean

what does all this mean?

i pray

since my soul is His to keep

that at night God just takes me in my sleep

He doesn’t want my soul, right now

right now, He just told me

He is taking care of everything

my mind had to be shut down for the awakening

my true self is beautiful despite the swollen eyes

because He put rainbows in my tears

Stars in my smile

i shine

gleam

despite and because of the darkness

my testimony will be a beacon

for someone else to find their way

through their were, are, and will be days

© michele mitchell, 2013

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