This was not gonna be my blog today.
I had no idea what my blog was gonna be, but this wasn’t gonna be it.
But my daughter insisted I watch what happened at the VMA’s and then write about it. I didn’t see the VMA’s, and when I tried to YouTube the performance, apparently, Viacom removed all the videos.
Wow, it must have been bad.
Let me segue real quick:
Did Miley actually have anything to twerk? Don’t look at me like that I am one of those “odd” Caucasian women who apparently have no shortage of um…”donk”. (Must be the squats)
For those who do in fact know how to “twerk”, I ain’t mad at you. I have a skill too. It’s called using my brain and getting two degrees. So, while you are struggling to get your associates degree and taking care of your boyfriend make sure you put down the blunt long enough to twerk for some cash at least.
Was that a bit much? My bad.
Secondly, I am not a Robin Thicke fan; he just isn’t impressive to me. And considering all of the “negativity” I heard surrounding the performance for him to “shout Miley out” on Twitter and say the performance was “dope” makes me believe he is in fact on dope.
Lastly, I must be old, but I don’t even know who Miley Cyrus is and do not believe I heard any of her songs.
Just as I was typing this my nineteen year old son walked in with his friend who may have been the same age or younger, so I asked them about the performance. His friend said, “Oh my God, it was disgusting. And for me to be disgusted says a lot. Mom, I’m sorry but she played with herself with a foam finger.”
My son just kept repeating, “No, No, No” over and over again as if he were traumatized.
WOW. It must have been bad.
I said that twice.
So then I was reading the celebrity reactions; they weren’t good either.
Wait, wait she used to be on Disney? Okay I guarantee it will come out later that she was either molested by Mickey Mouse or forced to do something obscene to Walt’s cryogenically frozen head.
I am so lost.
But should we really be surprised?
Music has stopped being music a long time ago. What happened to people who can sing? What happened to instruments???
What we hear today if we even bother to turn on the radio is a bunch of hyper-sexualized computerized garbage. Like some bored syrup sippin jerk thought it would be cool to synchronize the buzzing of vibrators. (Drake…my bad, but….)
Segue: I still can’t quite figure out why Rhianna is popular, but mark my word it has something to do with selling her soul, practicing voodoo and a sex tape with her, Jay Z and Bey. I never thought Bey was straight, but that’s another blog.
Here is my real complaint: She had on a “simulated nude outfit” BUT SHE HAD ON SNEAKERS?!?!?!?
See, where were the ho heels? If you are gonna attempt a twerk, even I know you need some ho heels.
Clear people, I tell ya.
All I’m sayin is I’m glad it wasn’t Justin she was twerkin on, cuz I woulda been fightin and mouse ears woulda been flyin errywhere.
Future for Miley: A continuous cycle of rehab and porn.
Next blog: I’m hoping I meditate tonight and I have something uplifting for y’all.
Peace and ShineOn!!!